The hardest part about growing up is letting go of what you were used to, and moving on with something you're not.
I think I'm quickly learning that life does not always go like we plan. That has been something I've struggled with for awhile now, trusting in God's plan instead of trying to make my own plan work. Over the past week I've just been up and down with my emotions, trying to figure out where exactly I'm going with everything in my life. I found out some unsettling things in the past week and they really got to me down deep and just kind of shook me to the core. It has made me reevaluate what kind of person I want to be seen as and the type of people I want to surround myself with. I have learned that sometimes you have to forget about what other people think or say about you because in the end only God knows your true heart. He knows who I am, what I'm living for, and ultimately where I am going in my journey. I have had so many stress factors in the past weeks since being here and I think I am finally starting to sort it all out. I am trusting that God has a plan for me and He will walk with me through everything so I should never be afraid of what I'm facing. This past week especially has taught me to handle everything with prayer. I just feel like the situation I'm in can only go up from here and I'm taking comfort in that. I have also said time and time again that I have met the most amazing people up here; they have really proven to be just as amazing as I make them out to be. I got texts, facebook comments and messages, and phone calls all from my friends and the people in my Bible study telling me they love me, they're praying for me, and they're here for me if I need anything. I have my roommates coming into my room all the time to hug me and remind me that I have them here for support. Most of all I've been reminded that family is the one thing in my life (aside from God) that will always remain constant. They are always on my side and just want what is best for me. It's been quite a difficult week, but to know that I am blessed with so many caring and genuine people, that is really all I need.
And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character, and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out His love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us. -Romans 5:2-5
What is still unknown has caused my fear to grow, fear of whats unseen... But with your embrace I know I can face, all thats facing me. -Jonny Diaz
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Erika, Wow, yours happened fast. My big question week happened the second semester in the dorm. I know the heart pain, the tears and the confusion. I'm sorry but proud of you. This is why I so wanted you to go away - for these crucial moments in life when we find out who we are and who we want to be ( as well as who we truely can and should trust.) There will be more times when friendships are questioned. You'll have to decide if you want to take the fork in the road on a new, unknown path leaving behind the pain and drama. It won't be easy in the moment, but in the longrun it will be the best move you make. I'm thinking of you alot, and wish you continued strong faith in yourself and God.
ReplyDeletePeace, Kim